Wednesday, April 20, 2005
[tis wus written sometime ago.. jus continuing on.. onli e blue part.. e pink n purple one wus done on e date shown] hmm.. now so sian so jus update bahh.. i dunno wat's exactly goin on in life now.. i dun wanna noe mayb.. den is like i dunno bahh.. i jus dun understand.. but i gues.. it isn't for me to understand de.. instead it's for me to live for.. well.. i dunno.. some ppl sae i wat? mature in my understanding.. hah! why m i so surprised? cos i'm tis sicko fella who's nuts and mentally unstable.. lack of concentration power.. kinda ben ben de.. summore? an idiot.. etc etc. and the list goes on.. trust me.. so now after listin all tis tingys.. seriously hafta admit dat i kinda surprised dat i hv like frens who still wan me.. but mayb is like they jus pretend de? is it.. hai.. dunno lehh.. but is like wat the.. sighh.. why nehh.. i so sad.. but wateva.. is jus dat life wasn't alwaes meant to go e wae we wanted.. sometimes it'll turn out e wrong wae round.. but one ting.. not to worry.. God was alwaes there to help us to set the path straight.. and right again.. so dun worry too much yeahh? well.. actually.. i tink tat sometimes we should tink of how life is gonna b like in e future instead of concentratin too much on e probs we face.. i mean like wat's e pt tinkin bout why is tis happening.. we shld tink of solutions.. dun u agree? mayb u might jus sae.. it's easier said den done.. i noe.. i experienced it more den anione of u can imagine.. but seriously.. i did a lot of tinking recently and i realised tat whenever i m dwn.. cry n tink instead of jus complainin bout my situation.. i wus alwaes sorry for wateva i did.. regret n wateva.. but s much s i regretted it.. i knew i had to do someting.. n i went ahead.. i did not regret den.. yeapp.. well.. let's c.. it's like recently. i went to think about e past.. to recollect memories.. i seriously had to thank God for all e probs He had put in front of me to overcome.. i know tat.. at tat pt of time when i wus upset.. i often said i could not carry on.. it wus too tough.. but now i realised.. whenever ppl occur similar probs.. i noe wat to do.. i noe how to react.. it's made me more mature in my thinkin in a wae.. i dun reali expect ppl to believe me.. but is like if i din experience these probs.. den i wouldn't b e person here animore.. seriously.. believe me.. mani times we would jus wonderin why tings were happening but i admit dat it took me some time to finally realise by myself dat it wus to help me strengthen in Him and in myself mentally.. i hav to thank God.. seriously.. ppl tink it's a weird ting to do but i dun.. i mean.. like if it strengthens me why not? i learnt that i can help my frens through my experiences.. my own account n stuff.. so is like.. it's a sacrifice dat's all.. n it's nth compared to e sacrifice Jesus made for everyone of us.. dat is why.. i dun wanna mind.. i won't sae dat i neva once thought tat God has let me down.. when i drifted awae from Him.. he din force me back to Him.. instead He coaxed me back to Him quietly.. He is so awesome.. we cnnt compare to Him in aniwae.. yeahh.. well.. i hope my frens will learn why probs r set on e path to life.. it wus to strengthen us.. tis kinda tings u cnnt listen to others.. instead u will experience it urself.. it's a path everyone has to take.. it's a matter of which path u take.. i hope u'll learn n understand.. it's a matter of time.. when u tink u have drifted awae from God.. open your heart to Him again and let Him come in.. He'll b more den overjoyed to c u running back to Him in open arms.. He loves each one of us more den how much we could ever love Him.. His love is unconditional and it is hard to comprehend.. but aniwae.. i hope dat u'll understand His love and u'll noe why u're goin thru all these kayy.. may God bless u abundantly..
[this goes out to whoever is reading this and hopefully finds it useful]
--- ..a prayer for whoever needs it.. ---
deaR paPa.. You know who needs this prayer rite now.. i jus pray that You'll take awae whoever is experiencing problems now.. i know dat You'll ans my prayer bcos You never ever fail us.. we all love You and thank You for all tat You've done for me.. rite now.. my frens mayb experiencing problems and dunno who to turn to.. so i pray that You'll appear b4 them and help them.. guide them through the rite path.. walk with them down even e rocky road.. i thank You.. i also pray that now You teach them how to stay and keep close to You even in their crisis.. also Lord.. i pray that You help me to study real hard to that my results will glorify Your name.. i pray that You'll help me have a change of attitude.. so dat others may see in me that i'm Your child and dat i will b able to spread Your word even more easily.. i thank You Lord for all that You've done for us.. i pray that You'll forgive all the sins i've committed especially lying.. i admit that i've lied mani times.. mayb i'm a complusive liar.. i'm sorry.. i pray that You'll help me to take awae tis habit of mine.. i thank You.. i Love u Lord greater than anything..
in Jesus name
aMen!!!
Wednesday, April 20, 2005;
